With the remaining books now stacked neatly in my flat, packaging materials no longer strewn across the floors, and the urgency to get people their books over, I’ve been having a very curious feeling these past few weeks.
Vulnerable and not ashamed
It may sound odd, but I can’t remember a time when I’ve not felt at least some embarrassment after having accomplished something. Sometimes, believe it or not, I’ve even felt quite ashamed at what are seemingly respectable accomplishments. I’d never really understood why I felt this way until now.
I just thought embarrassment and shame was part of the deal. And I’d typically keep that part of how I was feeling to myself, just nodding and smiling meekly as others sung my praises.
What publishing this book has shown me is that it was keeping the embarrassment and shame, and all the other less pleasant aspects of being a human, hidden that was the real issue. I never knew how to stand firm in my glory and not feel like I had to hide that there was a fragile human being behind that accomplishment.
As anyone who has already read A Journey For Happiness will know, the book gets deep into human vulnerabilities and questions what it means to live a happy and fulfilling life, yet it is also very personally exposing. I share deeply, openly, vulnerably…some might even say embarrassingly…yet it’s uncanny, I’ve never felt so proud of something I’ve done. There is no shame. I’ve stood firmly in my fragility. And it feels spectacular…
Have you got your book yet?
Those that helped crowdfund this book, should have their books by now. If you haven’t got yours yet, could you get in touch so I can investigate with the post office?
I’ve also been struck at how relaxed I am about whether the remaining books that I have will find homes. I mean, there is certainly an anxious voice inside reminding me I ought to take the bull by the horns and do much more if I really want to get this book to people and reap back some of the costs it took to produce it (FYI – I’m still a little bit down on printing costs).
Yet, that voice isn’t really mine. My real voice is in my book – it took some time to find it, buried beneath conditions, stories, and a whole host other bullshit. And in my book I celebrate authenticity, I question what it means to achieve, and I extoll the purposeful life. Some have told me that there is even magic in it.
I also talk a lot about our relationship with money, and I examine the lengths we go to manipulate and control for the sake of a few extra dollars. And I don’t want to do that myself. That would be selling the book short. It would undermine it.
I’m just going to have lean into the quality of the book. Though, quality probably won’t be enough – not in this day and age.
Word of mouth is where it’s at
That being said, I have appreciated people sharing with others about the book. A few well crafted social media posts from friends here and there have resulted in a trickle of book orders. Thank you. Below is a beautiful and touching example. What better way to share a book about happiness than through sharing and connecting with others.
So in the months to come, in balance with regular life demands, I’ll be doing a few things here and there to share ideas from the book. Some of these things might even interest people to explore these ideas further through getting stuck into a copy of A Journey For Happiness themselves.
There are also a few possible podcasts on the horizon, several talks (one coming up quite soon actually – I’m a bit scared about that), I’ll also share some things on social media here and there (maybe some quotes from the book, or even whole sections), and I’ll try to write for this blog a bit more.
And, I’ve even got my eyes on another journey, one day – it won’t be quite as far as Bhutan, but it’ll be just as epic, and deeply meaningful…there is much journeying in this happiness wizard yet…